Maybe it was one thing that happened. Maybe it was years of growing up in a home where safety, money, or love came with conditions. You may be breaking a cycle your family never named, and finding that understanding it hasn't made your body believe it's over. A tone of voice, a closed door, or a silence that goes on one beat too long can still pull you back.

IFS therapy works with those reactions directly, at a pace you control, without asking you to retell everything or push through what feels too big.

You're the one who decided it stops with you.

Trauma & Generational Trauma Therapy in maryland & virginia

  • You startle, tense up, or go blank in situations that look fine on paper.
  • You're the calm one in a crisis and fall apart quietly afterward.
  • You scan every room for who's upset before you've sat down.
  • You remember your childhood in flat facts, or hardly at all.
  • Closeness feels good, then feels unsafe, and you pull away without knowing why.
  • You've achieved a lot and you're tired in a way sleep doesn't fix.
  • You tell yourself other people had it worse, so you shouldn't be affected.
  • You've done years of talk therapy and understand it completely. Understanding hasn't made your body feel safe.
  • You recognize your parent's reactions in yourself, and you're determined not to pass them on.
  • Your family never talked about what happened, and you're the one who can't stop thinking about it.
  • You're the family's "strong one," and you've never been the one who got looked after.

Trauma Doesn't always look the way you'd expect

Trauma isn't only the large, obvious event. It can be a single frightening experience, or years of living without enough safety, steadiness, or care.

Neglect. An unpredictable home. A loss no one helped you through. A medical event. A workplace that wore you down.

What makes something traumatic isn't how it looks from the outside. It's that it overwhelmed your ability to cope at the time, and part of you has been coping ever since.

If you've been wondering whether what happened to you "counts," that question is worth bringing to a first conversation. You don't need a story that qualifies.

what counts as trauma? 

generational trauma: what's been passed down: 

Some of what you carry didn't start with you. It came through the family: the way fear was handled, what couldn't be talked about, what was expected of you, and what your parents or grandparents were carrying themselves.

You may recognize patterns that run through your family, such as silence, control, over-responsibility, or a constant sense that something could go wrong. You may have learned to cope the way the people around you did, and you may be the first one who wants something different.

IFS gives a way to work with this that doesn't blame your family and doesn't ask you to carry it forever. We look at the roles and burdens you took on, many of which weren't yours to begin with, and help the parts of you that hold them set them down.
Internal Family Systems (IFS) starts from the idea that you have parts, and that the parts of you that got you through are still on the job.

Some of those parts are protectors. They're the ones that keep you busy, in control, agreeable, numb, or on guard. They aren't the problem. They learned what they had to do to keep you safe. Underneath them are younger parts that carry the hurt, the fear, or the shame from what happened, and the protectors exist largely to keep those parts from being overwhelmed.

In this work, we don't push past your protectors. We get to know them first, and we ask their permission before going anywhere near the younger parts. As trust builds, those younger parts can finally put down what they've been carrying. IFS calls this unburdening, and it doesn't require you to retell the whole story or relive it to happen.

You stay in charge of the pace. You can slow down or pause at any point.

how IFS works with trauma

  • Safety first. Early sessions focus on steadiness: how you're doing day to day, what helps you ground, and what your protectors need to hear from me.
  • No pressure to share details. You decide what to say and when. Some clients tell me very little about what happened, and the work still moves.
  • Regular check-ins. We stop and ask whether this approach is helping and whether the pace is right.
  • Coordination if you want it. If you're working with a psychiatrist, physician, or another therapist, I'm glad to coordinate with your consent.

what you can expect

Who I work with

I work with adults in Maryland and Virginia, including those carrying childhood or developmental trauma, relational trauma, or the wear of a harmful workplace. Many of my clients look high functioning from the outside: capable, dependable, and tired of how much it takes to keep that up. Many have done other therapy and want something that reaches what talking alone didn't.

If this isn't quite what you're experiencing, these pages may be closer:

People-Pleasing & Over-Functioning →

For when being dependable has quietly become being unavailable to yourself

Anxiety & Perfectionism →

For the anxiety nobody sees because you handle everything so well

Entrepreneurs & Self-Made Wealth →

For the anxiety nobody sees because you handle everything so well

Therapists & Helping Professionals →

For when you're the helper and your own needs have become invisible

Every topic above can be explored in either format. Many people choose based on pace.

Two Ways To Work Together

iFS intensives: Go deeper, faster. 

A half day, full day, or multiple days of focused time. Private pay.

how intensives work

ongoing therapy: build change steadily

55 minute sessions, weekly or biweekly. In network with BCBS.

learn about ongoing therapy

Not sure which fits?

Either can work for trauma. Steady pacing often matters in this work, so ongoing sessions are a common place to start. An intensive can be a good fit when you feel ready for concentrated work, and we begin with a 90 minute pre-intensive call to make sure that's the right choice for you. 

see formats + pricing

Start with a free 15 minute conversation to talk about what's bringing you in, whether this is the right fit, and what pace would feel manageable.

You survived it. you don't have to keep surviving it.

schedule a free consultation